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(+17)(-1)

Okay so- first impressions are a bit negative to be honest. Whilst the artistic presentation and quality is top notch, and the music is excellent; the writing and voice direction is where this build falls incredibly hard.

Aside from the voice acting (as they're directed it seems) being all over the place and off-putting, the dialogue they're saying is unnatural and pulls the reader right out of the story. The writing itself is way too repetitive to get into it authentically (the over-use of "virtue" is especially irritating), and the characters feel akin to dolls that say their lines without having an inner-world.

I was only able to get to the presentation of the school's historian program before I couldn't read/listen any further. Because I didn't believe it would get any better; if this was the writing quality so far then that was as good as it was gonna get. The opening with the history of "Wander" was not a good foot to start on, but this was revealed to be 'the villain's'/Director's words, maybe it would be better if we actually got the MC's perspective (not a fan of MC being his actual initial's btw). But the quality didn't improve, and you can only appreciate the character art and music for so long before you just have to drop what you're absorbing.

ESPECIALLY when the writing has no substance to it.

Overall; I was excited for Spark Hearts, and was incredibly disappointed. But if anything I hope that with all the effort going into this project that the most important thing about a Visual Novel, the writing, can be improved to reflect the rest of the project!

(+2)

I think I agree with you here. Great visuals so far, love the camera movements as well, it sets the VN apart, but the dialogue is.... something.

Originally I thought his grandparents calling him "MC" was placeholder text, but when I realized it was his initials, it makes the entire conversation...weird.

At one point Maru says "In the media I've consumed..." and that is just the most unnatural way to put it. His inner world should illuminate his personality to the audience, and the way he speaks in his own head is like a robot or an alien.

I won't say anything about the visuals/VAing as its still in progress, but definitely they need to focus up more on the writing.

(+1)

Spot on. I think the art direction is fine (although I think that the camera work is a bit spotty, as it reminds me of a more jarring version of dangaronpa if I'm being honest). 


For me, here was what I thought: the intro should just straight up be dropped in all of its capacity and it should simply start with you being in the class itself, or start with the broken down group of people that MC was talking to (as their conversation I thought was actually pretty interesting, and brought up ideas that weren't really addressed ever again in the demo). 

The voice acting is a bit awkward overall, and the demo doesn't really give a good representation of what the actual game play loop would be. If it's going to only be talking primarily, then... Yeah, the dialogue needs a bit more refinement. 

I think the premise could be interesting as a subject to tackle, but there wasn't enough for *why* they were Historians or anything-- we don't even know why they were selected and based on the general dialogue, there isn't even really anything that you could begin to piece together as to why.