Views: 45369
Submissions: 184
Favs: 10539

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΄ | Registered: Jun 29, 2007 10:53
Kaylomei (Pseudonym, pron. KAY-luh-may) | 1987 | Bi (F pref.) | INTJ | Single by Choice | Bad at profiles
The Bottomless Life comic relaunch has been placed on indefinite hold.
Gonna be redoing my profile soon. There was way too much on it.
COMMISSIONS: CLOSED | TRADES: CLOSED | NO REQUESTS
The Bottomless Life comic relaunch has been placed on indefinite hold.
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bottomlessgirls - Founder and lead administrator |β
Gonna be redoing my profile soon. There was way too much on it.
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Stats
Comments Earned: 9941
Comments Made: 7900
Journals: 181
Comments Made: 7900
Journals: 181
Recent Journal
I Kinda Gave Up on Art.
6 months ago
But maybe I shouldn't have? I feel I got into this years ago for all the wrong reasons. Before I joined FA in 2007, and afterward through my entire university program, I truly felt inspiration left and right to draw new things and continuously learn and improve. Everything I did was not for a deadline, it wasn't to meet a customer's specifications, and it sure as heck wasn't for money. But joining FA planted the seed that I could (with enough practice and effort) make at least some semblance of an income from drawing. So I set out to become the best I could be. And that's where the problems began.
I found myself in an increasingly large pool of talent far better at this than I was. Every line placed with anatomical precision, every stroke of paint seamlessly blended to a fine sheen, every color chosen to near perfectly mimic lighting and shadows. The more I chased down these styles and techniques I saw, the more I saw my own lack of performance and the less I became inspired to do anything at all. How long would it take me to be "proficient and speedy" enough to start taking commissions for what I drew/painted? I saw no end to the tunnel at all, and every huge breakthrough felt like moving less than a nanometer toward my goal. And with that, my inspirations and ideas to draw depleted in tandem. Everything I envisioned in my head never even came close to translating to paper/canvas at all. I hated my lack of skill, and moreover I hated how far off my personal art style was from my intended Disney-esque design style... and it felt like I had zero way of course-correcting.
Art went from being fun, to being a loathsome chore I had no more interest in whatsoever.
So maybe I should simply take my original approach and do things for my own enjoyment, and not care how it looks or who sees it, nor who is/isn't happy with it. Watching TV or online videos doesn't really do much anymore for relaxing, what with the internet and modern media's hellfire incessant hyper-fixation on all things political. I just miss the days of coming home from classes/work and drawing simply to relax and escape. And if something I did just so happened to be somewhat to my liking, I might post it for a small bit of engagement. That's how it used to be.
Maybe I should do that again.
I found myself in an increasingly large pool of talent far better at this than I was. Every line placed with anatomical precision, every stroke of paint seamlessly blended to a fine sheen, every color chosen to near perfectly mimic lighting and shadows. The more I chased down these styles and techniques I saw, the more I saw my own lack of performance and the less I became inspired to do anything at all. How long would it take me to be "proficient and speedy" enough to start taking commissions for what I drew/painted? I saw no end to the tunnel at all, and every huge breakthrough felt like moving less than a nanometer toward my goal. And with that, my inspirations and ideas to draw depleted in tandem. Everything I envisioned in my head never even came close to translating to paper/canvas at all. I hated my lack of skill, and moreover I hated how far off my personal art style was from my intended Disney-esque design style... and it felt like I had zero way of course-correcting.
Art went from being fun, to being a loathsome chore I had no more interest in whatsoever.
So maybe I should simply take my original approach and do things for my own enjoyment, and not care how it looks or who sees it, nor who is/isn't happy with it. Watching TV or online videos doesn't really do much anymore for relaxing, what with the internet and modern media's hellfire incessant hyper-fixation on all things political. I just miss the days of coming home from classes/work and drawing simply to relax and escape. And if something I did just so happened to be somewhat to my liking, I might post it for a small bit of engagement. That's how it used to be.
Maybe I should do that again.
User Profile
Accepting Trades
No Accepting Commissions
No Character Species
Does 'Cartoonist' Count?
Favorite Music
Modern Rock, Early 2000s Electronica
Favorite Foods & Drinks
Me Gusta Los Tacos
Favorite Quote
"A hot body is great and all, but sexy is between the EARS not the LEGS." -Catherine Glewwe
Favorite Artists
Too many to name
Contact Information





