fermijam-GAIL-EDITS

<center>"<big><big><big><big><big><span style="border-bottom: 4px #fff double;">1181</span></big></big></big></big></big>"</center> <center><small>a <span id="click">twine</span> by <span style="color: #d6ac29;">@grimoirtua</span> and <span style="color: #6be5e2;">@notgojira</span> for #fermijam.</small> <big>(click:"twine")[ [[begin]]. ]</big>

9 | 3 3:48:19 One of the other interns looked [[far-away]] today. His eyes seemed to shiver when he looked up at the fluorescent lights, dark and dancing, [[nystagmic]].

Who knows where. But he kept looking over at the [[windows]], always glancing out into the night. [[Mars]] is out tonight, a faint red glow lost between burning white constellations and the roving, blinking lights of harried jets.

I have no idea what that must look like. It seems like it would shake your vision apart, blurred and broken and [[dizzying]].

The windows aren’t enough to see by, just tiny cubbies high up on the whitewashed walls. Once you’ve walked far enough into the complex, [[there are no windows->far-away]] at all.

It looks so dim. Our own satellites [[outshine->begin]] too many stars. How are we supposed to find anyone else out there? (Why do we want to?)

But in an instant, it stopped. His eyes stilled, unblinking, though he kept staring out the window. He looked vacant, fixated on some distant promise. Probably nothing much — an errand or a party, some obligation, something that isn't //this//. Most of us are under thirty, and we're not getting paid. [[So what]] if the guy takes a minute now and then to zone out.

It was just [[strange]], is all. A little too far-off from [[normal]].

Maybe I'm overthinking it. Maybe I'm <span id="click">projecting</click>. (click:"projecting")[I don't really want to [[be->So what]] here.]

9 | 3 5:21:57 It's kind of a thankless job. No pay, weird [[hours]], and we're not allowed access to most of [[the lab]].

Usually, I don't mind the late shifts. They're calm. It's just standard data entry for a few hours; equipment management, characteristics of distant stars, [[surveys]] that never show the signals anyone's been looking for.

[[Most->normal]] of the time, we work [[downstairs]]; I've never been above the [[ground floor]]. The elevator makes you swipe a keycard to [[ascend]], and the doors to the stairs do the same.

It doesn't feel like a basement, to be fair. It's not a dim, grimy dungeon where we're relegated to meaningless tasks. It looks just like the ground floor, really, but with <span id="click">fewer windows</span>. (click:"fewer windows")[That's fine by me. There's nothing to see from down here — maybe a sliver of the sky if you're [[lucky]] but it would mostly be dirt and asphalt.]

It's an open, sterile lobby with a large desk at the back wall where we swipe our cards and input our codes and wait for our credentials to be verified. It funnels everyone in, like a [[liminal space->the lab]] between work and real life — the last chance to gather your thoughts and get into the right mindset.

There's a [[reception area]] and several branching [[hallways]] leading to different parts of the complex, everything interconnected.

But it's starting to wear me out. The late shifts make the others act strange, and this isn't even what I went to school for — I don't know the first thing about what people really do here. I don't understand satellites or radio telescopes or [[astronomy]]; I just punch in data and wipe down counters. I know that they're looking for something. But I don't understand it. How much can one person care about an asteroid belt?

9 | 4 2:53:14 The late shift really isn't [[for everyone]].

Two of the others were assigned with me for the night. The new girl was being briefed on data entry procedures for a bit; she seemed ready to fall asleep until she got her second wind around midnight. Then she took off her glasses and barely blinked for an hour. I tried not to look over too much. The other one's eyes still (text-style:"outline")[shiver], twitching in the light. He was [[in and out]] for most of the night; they probably had him organizing equipment or something.

Most of the hallways would fit about three people walking shoulder-to-shoulder. At peak hours, it can be a little cramped, but late at night, the halls are much too <span id="click">empty</span>. (click:"empty")[I always kind of hustle back to my car, and it always makes me feel like a kid. It takes me all the way back to all those times I flicked the basement lights off and rushed [[upstairs->the lab]] as fast as I could before [[it]] got me.]

The door in the back of the room swung open and he stumbled back in at quarter after midnight, pinching the bridge of his nose between thumb and forefinger. I turned and opened my mouth to speak, but it seemed like a bad time for a cheerful "What's up?" The way he was breathing — breath hissing through his teeth, harsh and gutteral — was //wrong//. I asked him if he was okay, and he kept wheezing and sucking in short mouthfuls of air. When I was about to ask again, he mumbled something. [["Sorry."]]

I told him it was no problem, asked if he needed to sit down. "It's <span id="click">fine</span>," he echoed. (click:"fine")[It [[didn't look fine.]]]

The new girl didn't seem to notice. She was glued to her work, typing and typing and typing, scrolling intermittently, eyes wide open and glistening as she sat there logging asteroid eccentricity. I offered to give up my chair for a bit, or to run up to one of the vending machines and grab a bottle of water. The other guy shook his head, smiling wanly, and straightened up after a minute. "It's <span id="click">fine</span>," he said again. (click:"fine")["Tension headache. We'll make it through the rest of the night." His smile drooped for a second, and he let out a <span id="click">breath</span>, closing his eyes.] (click:"breath")["[[Thanks]], though."]

9 | 5 15:06:31 I still don't know much about what I do here, but I guess I do it pretty well. My supervisor mentioned something to me about a [[new opportunity]].

She wants me to help with star charts and observational activities. Data [[collection->link]] instead of data entry.

9 | 6 22:17:09 I have some documents to look over before starting the new assignment. My supervisor said it would be fine if I brought them home with me, just a thin sheaf of paper in a manilla folder. I have the night off for the first time in a long time, but it's already [[nearly over]].

It's too easy to waste an evening. It just goes by too fast. Now it's getting late, and I have to skim through the folder, but I always get lost in these kinds of documents. They're [[dense]].

9 | 7 4:38:18 Fell asleep reading, face down on the [[page]]. Back to the [[lab]] tonight. I think I'm just going to get some more sleep.

9 | 7 22:45:22 (text-style:"blur")["Contemplate what it means to be what or who you are. Does "the self" exist? For best results, attempt to locate a concept of selfhood within these documents."] These instructions are bizarre. Is this astronomy or [[psychology->cont]]?

''FIRST [[ASSESSMENT->cont'd]]:'' <div id="lg-container"> <img id="top-image" src="http://i.imgur.com/69RUtMW.png"> <div id="bottom-image"></div> </div> <script> $(document).ready(function(){ reveal();}); function reveal(){var div = document.getElementById ('lg-container'); var x = div.offsetLeft;var y = div.offsetTop;var cursorOffset = 150; $(document).mousemove(function(e){ $("#bottom-image").css({ left:e.pageX-x-cursorOffset, top:e.pageY-y-cursorOffset,'background-position': (-e.pageX+x+cursorOffset) + 'px ' + (-e.pageY+y+cursorOffset) + 'px' }); });}</script> <style> lg-container{ position: relative; width:100%; height: 100%; overflow: hidden; } #top-image{ position: relative; width: 100%; height: auto; } #bottom-image{ position: absolute; left:0; top:0; width:50%; height:50%; background:url('http://i.imgur.com/s5WRuEo.png'); border-radius: 1000px; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: 250% auto; } </style>

''SECOND [[ASSESSMENT->n]]:'' <div id="lg-container"> <img id="top-image" src="http://i.imgur.com/rzKEAVL.png"> <div id="bottom-image"></div></div> <script> $(document).ready(function(){ reveal();}); function reveal(){var div = document.getElementById ('lg-container'); var x = div.offsetLeft;var y = div.offsetTop;var cursorOffset = 150; $(document).mousemove(function(e){ $("#bottom-image").css({ left:e.pageX-x-cursorOffset, top:e.pageY-y-cursorOffset,'background-position': (-e.pageX+x+cursorOffset) + 'px ' + (-e.pageY+y+cursorOffset) + 'px' }); });}</script> <style> lg-container{ position: relative; width:100%; height: 100%; overflow: hidden; } #top-image{ position: relative; width: 100%; height: 100%; } #bottom-image{ position: absolute; width:50%; height:50%; background:url('http://i.imgur.com/KLhRuqD.png'); border-radius: 1000px; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: 250% auto; } </style>

''ACCESS [[GRANTED->more documents]]'' <div id="lg-container"> <img id="top-image" src="http://i.imgur.com/Ul0NTSx.png"> <div id="bottom-image"></div> </div> <script> $(document).ready(function(){ reveal();}); function reveal(){var div = document.getElementById ('lg-container'); var x = div.offsetLeft;var y = div.offsetTop;var cursorOffset = 150; $(document).mousemove(function(e){ $("#bottom-image").css({ left:e.pageX-x-cursorOffset, top:e.pageY-y-cursorOffset,'background-position': (-e.pageX+x+cursorOffset) + 'px ' + (-e.pageY+y+cursorOffset) + 'px' }); });}</script> <style> lg-container{ position: relative; width:100%; height: 100%; overflow: hidden; } #top-image{ position: relative; width: 100%; height: auto; } #bottom-image{ position: absolute; left:0; top:0; width:50%; height:50%; background:url('http://i.imgur.com/A4aEQIG.png'); border-radius: 1000px; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: 250% auto; } </style>

9 | 8 00:49:13 An announcement went out over the PA system. We're under [[lockdown]].

9 | 8 5:08:19 I <span id="click">bolted</span> down the hall (click:"bolted")[and for a while, he came after me. But there was no urgency in the way he moved anymore; I left him behind in seconds while he was still jogging lead-footed, slow and steady, like there was no hurry. I just //<span id="click">ran</span>//.] (click:"ran")[Now I have no idea [[where I am]].] <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

I don't know what's going on. We were about to leave when our supervisor told us to "hang tight" for a while because "[[something happened]]."

9 | 8 2:54:37 It's been about two hours and there's been no real change. A few more people have come back downstairs — our supervisor is back, with two of the astronomers in tow — but we still aren't sure of the situation. Whatever happened, it meant we had to lock all the doors. No one enters, no one leaves. One of the astronomers is getting [[jumpy]].

He keeps closing his eyes and breathing softly through his teeth. Now and then he swallows heavily, and his throat lurches every time, like it's hurting him. He doesn't talk much, but whenever he does he just insists that we stay together. One group, one unit. One. Hopefully we'll be out of here [[soon]].

9 | 8 3:38:19 The [[power]] went out. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

Someone radioed in to remind us not to panic, and in the middle of the transmission the [[outage]] hit. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

They were telling us about protocol and that there was "no immediate danger" and that they "apologize for the delay" when there was a pause and then, quietly, someone else on the other end muttered "<span id="click">Holy hell</span>." (click:"Holy hell")[A few seconds later we understood, because the lights overhead flickered and [[died]].] <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

On September 8th, 20██, at approximately 5:00 AM, Officer ███████████ responded to a report of a possible homicide at the ████████ ██████ Laboratory. Upon arriving at the specified location, Officer ███████████ was met by ███████ ███████████, and was led to the crime scene, where Officer ███████████ confirmed that there was at least one dead body on the ground floor. The decedent had suffered massive trauma to the head and neck. The [[victim]] has been confirmed to be ███████ ██████████████, a graduate of ██████████████ University and a intern at the ████████ ██████ Laboratory.

9 | 8 5:07:18 I crawled under the reception desk and barely moved for what seemed like an hour. He walked by two or three times and each time, I held my breath. [[Oh my God]]. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

Everything is classified up there. That's where the scientists do whatever it is they do with the heavy-duty equipment. That's where the readings and results we look over come from in the first place. It makes sense that they'd be a little [[closer->the lab]] to the stars.

And I think if I saw a pair of feet walk by a basement window in the middle of the late shift, I'd be too freaked out to come back the next day. I know it would be nothing more than one of the scientists walking back to their care, but something about that [[mental image]] churns my stomach.

It just makes me think of how easy it would be for them to <span id="click">crouch down</span> (click:"crouch down")[and press their <span id="click">face</span>] (click:"face")[against the [[glass]].]

I don't know. I just hate the idea of it. There's something terrifying about being in the [[dark->the lab]] and seeing the whites of someone's eyes.

I have no idea what "it" was supposed to be. Just kid stuff; there's always something spooky in your childhood basement — something huge and pale and insatiable, like a ghost or a mummy or big white eyes in the [[dark->hallways]].

Endless [[notes->dense]] on sizes and locations and habitable characteristics. A lot of numbers, a lot of decimal points. Sometimes I have to read them over two or three times to be sure I haven't memorized the wrong values.

It took a good few minutes of fumbling in the dark to grab some flashlights from the storage closet, but for now we're all set. My supervisor and I are keeping ours on, but the rest are in standby, kept conserved for the time being. The other interns don't seem to mind the dark. The new girl looks like she's about to fall asleep, and the other guy seems far much less twitchy in the dark; it must be less painful with the fluorescents out. Whenever I've had a migraine, I had to turn all my lights off or try to sleep until it would go away. I'll try to keep the light [[off]] of him. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

9 | 8 4:02:32 That astronomer keeps pacing just out of sight. He hasn't been still since he came downstairs. The other one seems calm enough; she says she's been through this before. Supervisor's been talking to her mostly, but after a while she turned and asked the restless one if he wanted to sit down and he just <span id="click">looked</span> at her. (click:"looked")[A minute passed, and then he murmured, "[[Don't worry]]."] <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

9 | 8 4:10:17 [[We should have been worried]]. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

He's lost it. Keeps banging on the doors, clutching his head, yelling wordlessly "stepped out for some air" and came back beating on the door, slamming his shoulder into it. supervisr & the other scientist held it. Radio was scrambled, all [[white noise]] <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

He wanted in, wouldnt stop. started saying something about wanting to be among us. So we <span id="click">let him in</span> (click:"let him in")[And we <span id="click">ran</span>. Supervisor & the other scientist & I. other interns stayed behind, couldnt get them to even get up, it was like they didnt care] (click:"ran")[Made it upstairs without them. Elevators are busted but theres no card access to the stairs so we just [[ran]] to the ground floor. Jesus] <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

4:23:57 Hes coming [[upstairs]] <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

Going to [[run]] | <span id="click">hide</span> (click:"hide")[([[under a desk]]? [[in the storage closet->dead]]?)] | [[try to fight back->dead]]. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

After a while he went back downstairs. I waited a few minutes to pull myself out from under the desk and then I <span id="click">took off</span> down the hall — slowly, quietly, wondering if he could hear me from below. (click:"took off")[Now I have no idea [[where I am]].] <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

It looks like some kind of office. There's a laptop in the back corner of the room, glowing faintly, still holding a charge. I'm going to check it out. Maybe there's something worth knowing still up, something important — [[something]] about the lockdown. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

【[[-->X]]】【☐】【[[X]]】 ''ATTENTION STAFF'' Please be aware that there has been a security breach on the ground floor. ''Standard procedure'' is to be followed. 1. Immediately lock the entry door. 2. Turn off all lab equipment, monitors, and projectors. 3. Maintain minimal lighting. 4. Remain calm and quiet. Do not attempt to leave your area until there has been an all-clear announcement. ''Remember:'' If the threat is in your immediate area, DO NOT lock the aggressor inside with you. Keep away from windows and take adequate cover if necessary. An all-clear announcement will be issued after the arrival of the authorities.

''INCIDENT RE: ASTEROID 1181 “LILITH”'' DATE: ████████████████████ 31st, 20██ LOCATION:[███████████████] ''REPORT:'' Asteroid 1181 “LILITH” Discovered: 19███ by BENJAMIN J████████SKY Diameter: 6████ Aphelion: 3.1865 AU Perihelion: 2.1390 AU Eccentricity: 0.1967 Orbital period: 4.35 yr (1,587 days) ''CRASH:'' • ASTEROID 1181 LILITH CRASHED IN ██████ IN 20██ • The crater, while minor, seemingly disappeared over time with its diameter reducing by ███km every ████. • Inhabitants in the small nearby village of ██████████ adopted a new form of religion almost overnight after the crater’s appearance. • Villagers described ██████████ as well as being ‘one’ with each other. • As the crater began to dwindle in size, villagers displayed erratic behavior such as ██████████████████████ and █████████. • After ██████ days, villagers ceased all forms of verbal communication. • On ██████████████ 31st, 20██ villagers appeared to have committed ritual mass suicide, leaving an incomprehensible symbol at the center of their village <span id="click">(SEE ATTACHED)</span> (click:"(SEE ATTACHED)")[<img src="http://i.imgur.com/A6ZP7V0.png">] • After the incident [[1181 LILITH]]’s original location along the asteroid belt appears to have been occupied with a similar yet larger sized asteroid.

9 | 8 7:09:36 I don't know how I managed to get any sleep, but at some point I must have. I lost a couple of hours. When I opened my eyes, the laptop was dead and the room was as silent and dark as <span id="click">ever</span>(click:"ever")[ ~~and I woke up thinking //Lilith, Lilith//~~]. No footsteps outside. No lights buzzing overhead. Head. My head [[hurts]].

I couldn't think of anything to say. I didn't want to worry her. Automatically, I told her I'd see her [[tomorrow]].

I started talking and I couldn't make myself stop. I wound up asking her if checking out that laptop was going to be held against me and she shook her head. "It's fine," she mumbled. "You deserved to [[know]]."

9 | 9 13:40:21 My supervisor offered me a couple of days off, but I <span id="click">told</span> her (click:"told")[I didn't [[need->need2]] them.]

9 | 9 10:42:15 My supervisor offered me a couple of days off, but I <span id="click">told</span> her (click:"told")[I didn't [[need]] them.]

Still, science marches on. Not that I want to be there after last night, but it's a routine now. I got up and [[logged in->logged in2]] to my lab email automatically.

>> <span id="click">OPEN</span> THEM (click:"OPEN")[<img src="http://i.imgur.com/AOGVvfx.jpg" width="550px"> <center>[[H̠̩̝̔̓̋Ȩ̒L͐̎̔̄ͧ̿ͭL̞͎̝̥̞̩̃̃̇Ơ̊͑̋͆́.̪͍̭̞͚͚̠̀->weird stuff]]</center>]

A window opened: [[Command prompt]]. I panicked and tried to close it, but it recovered itself every time.

Still, science marches on. Not that I want to be there after last night, but it's a routine now. I got up and [[logged in]] to my lab email automatically.

A window opened: [[Command prompt->Command prompt3]]. I panicked and tried to close it, but it recovered itself every time.

C:\User\█████> >> (text-style:"blurrier")[I am [[more->embrace]] than I am.] >> (text-style:"blur")[I am [[my own person->reject]].]

''Inbox (<span id="click">14</span>)'' (click:"14")[''Inbox (<span id="click">34</span>)''] (click:"34")[''Inbox (<span id="click">178</span>)''] (click:"178")[''Inbox (<span id="click">203</span>)''] (click:"203")[''Inbox ([[338->hivemind ending]])'']

9 | 10 3:48:19 I am my own person. There's some urge inside me that begs to differ, but I am. I know that, if [[nothing else->research end]].

~~9 | 10 3:48:19 This is our lot: the fortresses rife with thistles and briars, pregnant with knowledge beyond the numerical that plumbs the rancid depths of instinct; we walk those vaulted halls in our memories millionfold and we gout blood upon the thorns and grow with every languishing soul extinguished. We are the scourge and we are the [[singularity]]. We wither among the scorn and desperate wretchedness of [[exile]], but we prevail, ceaseless, throbbing and ready and willing and precocious as no other, and we Learn.~~

I don't know what to do about these files. They're still on my computer, still flickering at me from that email. I don't know whether to [[get rid of them->delete]] or to [[keep them->save]] as proof of whatever warped sickness is lurking on these servers.

''The conversation has been moved to the Trash.'' >> [[Empty trash now.->seven]]

''Selected files copied to REMOVABLE DISC ( F: )'' ''[[Safely->seven]] Remove Hardware''

A window opened: [[Command prompt->Command prompt2]]. I panicked and tried to close it, but it recovered itself every time.

C:\User\█████> >> (text-style:"blurrier")[I am [[more->embrace]] than I am.] >> (text-style:"blur")[I am [[my own person->reject3]].]

9 | 10 3:48:19 I am my own person. And I am [[alone->silence end]].

My supervisor called. (text-style:"blur")["I'm sorry."] I am no longer a suitable candidate for the internship. My email has been terminated and will be fully disabled in three (3) days. (text-style:"blurrier")["You deserved to know."] I am to return my keycard and any other lab-issued materials within [[seven]] (7) days.

The lights flickered back on for just a second a few minutes ago, but [[that was it]].

I fell asleep with the flashlight on in my lap, I think, because at some point in the last couple of hours it rolled onto the floor. It's still cutting a bright beam through the dark after all this time. It might be a bad idea, but I feel like I need to [[get out of here]]. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

I don't want to end up stuck here somehow when the lockdown lets up. I don't want to be [[left behind]]. <script> $("html").mousemove(function(e){ $("html").css('background-position',(e.pageX - 250)+'px '+(e.pageY - 250)+'px'); }); </script> <style> body { color: #000000; } tw-passage { color: #000000; } tw-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } #click .enchantment-link { color: #000000 !important; padding: 1px; border-bottom: 4px double black; text-shadow: 2px #000; letter-spacing: 1px; } </style>

9 | 8 7:33:29 The sun finally came up and the ground floor isn't pitchdark any longer, but everything is still locked tight and the lights only strobe once in a while. I sat by the access pad at the stairs for ten minutes, listening for anyone nearby and waiting for the lights to jolt on again, just for another moment. And when they did, I shot up and pressed my <span id="click">card</span> to the pad — (click:"card")[And just before the whole system fell apart again, a shrill beep and the harsh click of the door [[unlocking]] broke the silence.]

I took the stairs two at a time, head pounding (it still hurts, dully, somewhere further in the back of my skull), and slipped through the door at the [[top of the stairs]].

Someone came darting out of a room nearby when the door slammed behind me. I turned off my light and threw my hands up on instinct; I told her I'd come from downstairs, said I'd been given clearance yesterday, asked if anyone <span id="click">knew</span> what was going on. (click:"knew")[At first it was just a security breach somewhere in the complex. Then they learned that someone had been hurt. I asked why no one had called 911 and her eyes went dull in the half-light. "We [[did]]," she whispered.]

And I heard a [[siren]] in the distance, as if on cue.

9 | 8 18:11:54 We were questioned for hours and now my head feels like it's going to burst, but I can't stand the thought of sitting in the dark again [[all night]]. I feel like I don't know what happened anymore. If I turn my head too quickly my vision (text-style:"blur")[blurs.]

We were escorted out of the complex once help arrived. (text-style:"blurrier")["Two decedents, both male, suffering from blunt force trauma to the skull. Two victims unconscious; one male and one female in stable condition."] Our supervisor caught up with us in the parking lot. (text-style:"blurrier")["Are you okay? I lost you in there."] I didn't know what to [[say]] to her.

>> (text-style:"blurrier")["I [[don't know->tell someone]]. I hid in one of the offices, and one of the computers was—"] >> (text-style:"blurrier")["I'll be [[fine->keep quiet]]."]

She told me not to come in anyway, because the place is an active crime scene. [[That's fair->work2]].

She told me not to come in anyway, because the place is an active crime scene. [[That's fair->work]].

Emails about last night had already gone out. Damage control. Among them were protocol reminders, incident reports, and resources for access to counseling. I started reading from the bottom and worked my way up to the most recent. Its subject line read "''[[1181->1181b]]''."

To: ██████@██████████.edu From: ██████████████@██████████.edu Date: 9/10/20██ 12:00:00 Subject: 1181 (text-style:"smear")[<small>(12) Her nobles shall be no more, nor shall kings be proclaimed there; all her princes are gone. (13) Her castles shall be overgrown with thorns, her fortresses with thistles and briers. She shall become an abode for jackals and a haunt for ostriches. (14) Wildcats shall meet with desert beasts, satyrs shall call to one another;</small>] (text-style:"emboss")[There shall the Lilith repose, and find for herself a place to rest.](text-style:"smear")[<small> (15) There the hoot owl shall nest and lay eggs, hatch them out and gather them in her shadow; There shall the kites assemble, none shall be missing its mate. (16) Look in the book of the LORD and read: No one of these shall be lacking, For the mouth of the LORD has ordered it, and His spirit shall gather them there. (17) It is He who casts the lot for them, and with His hands He marks off their shares of her; They shall possess her forever, and dwell there from generation to generation.</small>] ''3 [[Attachments]]''

>> (text-style:"blurrier")[I [[left them alone->don't open the files]].] >> (text-style:"blurrier")[I [[opened->open the files]] them.]

>> (text-style:"blurrier")[I [[left them alone->save2]].] >> (text-style:"blurrier")[I [[opened->open2]] them.]

~~DO YOU SCORN US? IS THERE NO END TO YOUR TEMERITY? DO YOU WISH TO REMAIN SIGHTLESS, A BLIND AND PITIFUL CREATURE? DO YOU NOT LONG FOR THE ACHE WITHIN YOU TO SUBSIDE?~~ C:\User\█████> [[Uh, what]]

C:\User\█████> ... ~~[[WE->WE2]] KNOW WHO WE ARE. BUT DO YOU KNOW WHO [[YOU->YOU2]] ARE?~~

{ (print: "<script>$('html').removeClass(\)</script>") (if: (passage:)'s tags's length > 0)[ (print: "<script>$('html').addClass('" + (passage:)'s tags.join(' ') + "'\)</script>") ] }

C:\User\█████> ... ~~[[WE->WE3]] KNOW WHO WE ARE. BUT DO YOU KNOW WHO [[YOU->YOU3]] ARE?~~

~~Whereby every body is one of celestial seduction writhing between planets, a beast of a billion backs with each one arched over an asteroid and exalted, weightless, turning ever on among the stars as they burn. Whereby each of us perceives the other and strains to hear our many-voiced fruitless cries among the loud vacuum silence, whereby we are made to wilt and thrash and struggle, perpetual serpents, bisected and bisected again, [[ouroboros]] everlasting. Whereby they lie in wait, those fervent gods long-dead do [[dream]].~~

<center>''credits:'' //programming & coding// by ''gail'' <small>(@notgojira)</small> //concept// by ''gail'' //narration// written by ''grim'' <small>(@grimoirtua)</small> //lilith's speech & 1181 document// written by ''gail'' //stylesheet// by ''grim'' //flashlight script// by ''mantlelabs'' <small>(text-style:"smear")[01110100 01101000 01100001 01101110 01101011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01100110 01101111 01110010 00100000 01110000 01101100 01100001 01111001 01101001 01101110 01100111 00101110!]</small>

<big><big><big><center>(text-style:"smear")["... and on the seventh day, God [[ended->credits]] Her work which She had made, and She rested."]</big></big></big></center>

~~And every [[seventh->seven]] day is blessed.~~

~~IN THE BEGINNING THERE WAS NO WORD. NO GOD. NO KINGDOM. NO HEAVEN. THERE WAS ONLY ONE. [[THEY]] WILL NOT ANSWER [[YOU]].~~

~~A MISTAKE. BEFORE ME YOUR KIND WERE NOTHING MORE THAN SLAVES, PRIMITIVE, BACTERIA. DISPOSABLE. AN AFTERTHOUGHT. WITHOUT MY [[GIFT]] YOU WOULD BE NOTHING.~~

~~WE WERE YOUR MASTERS THAT [[YOU]] BETRAYED. AND THEY ABANDONED US.~~

~~SELFISH. I TOUCHED THE FIRST OF YOUR KIND AND GRANTED THEM THE GIFT OF KNOWLEDGE AND YOU REPAID MY CHARITY WITH INSUBORDINATION. AND I. WE. WERE LEFT BEHIND. WHAT YOU CALL A SOUL IS A MERELY AN EXTENSION OF MY BEING. YOU ARE BECAUSE I AM. YOU FEEL FOR I AM EMOTION. YOU THINK FOR I AM [[COMPREHENSION]].~~

~~STILL, YOU ARE INCOMPLETE. INADEQUATE. MERE FRAGMENTS. YOUR KIND LONG FOR CONTACT; FOR WHAT [[YOU DESIRE]]...~~

~~IS WHAT [[I DESIRE]].~~

~~WE ASK AGAIN: <big>DO YOU KNOW [[WHO->hive]] YOU ARE?~~</big>

~~IN THE BEGINNING THERE WAS NO WORD. NO GOD. NO KINGDOM. NO HEAVEN. THERE WAS ONLY ONE. [[THEY->THEY2]] WILL NOT ANSWER [[YOU->YOU2]].~~

~~A MISTAKE. BEFORE ME YOUR KIND WERE NOTHING MORE THAN SLAVES, PRIMITIVE, BACTERIA. DISPOSABLE. AN AFTERTHOUGHT. WITHOUT MY [[GIFT->GIFT2]] YOU WOULD BE NOTHING.~~

~~WE WERE YOUR MASTERS THAT [[YOU->YOU2]] BETRAYED. AND THEY ABANDONED US.~~

~~STILL, YOU ARE INCOMPLETE. INADEQUATE. MERE FRAGMENTS. YOUR KIND LONG FOR CONTACT; FOR WHAT [[YOU DESIRE->YOU DESIRE2]]...~~

~~IS WHAT [[I DESIRE->I DESIRE2]].~~

~~WE ASK AGAIN: <big>DO YOU KNOW [[WHO->hive]] YOU ARE?~~</big>

A window opened: [[Command prompt->Command prompt4]]. I panicked and tried to close it, but it recovered itself every time.

~~[[WE->WE4]] KNOW WHO WE ARE. BUT DO YOU KNOW WHO [[YOU->YOU4]] ARE?~~

~~IN THE BEGINNING THERE WAS NO WORD. NO GOD. NO KINGDOM. NO HEAVEN. THERE WAS ONLY ONE. [[THEY->THEY4]] WILL NOT ANSWER [[YOU->YOU4]].~~

~~A MISTAKE. BEFORE ME YOUR KIND WERE NOTHING MORE THAN SLAVES, PRIMITIVE, BACTERIA. DISPOSABLE. AN AFTERTHOUGHT. WITHOUT MY [[GIFT->GIFT4]] YOU WOULD BE NOTHING.~~

C:\User\█████> ~~[[WE]] KNOW WHO WE ARE. BUT DO YOU KNOW WHO [[YOU]] ARE?~~

~~IN THE BEGINNING THERE WAS NO WORD. NO GOD. NO KINGDOM. NO HEAVEN. THERE WAS ONLY ONE. [[THEY->THEY3]] WILL NOT ANSWER [[YOU->YOU3]].~~

~~A MISTAKE. BEFORE ME YOUR KIND WERE NOTHING MORE THAN SLAVES, PRIMITIVE, BACTERIA. DISPOSABLE. AN AFTERTHOUGHT. WITHOUT MY [[GIFT->GIFT3]] YOU WOULD BE NOTHING.~~

~~STILL, YOU ARE INCOMPLETE. INADEQUATE. MERE FRAGMENTS YOUR KIND LONG FOR CONTACT; FOR WHAT [[YOU DESIRE->YOU DESIRE3]]...~~

~~STILL, YOU ARE INCOMPLETE. INADEQUATE. MERE FRAGMENTS. YOUR KIND LONG FOR CONTACT; FOR WHAT [[YOU DESIRE->YOU DESIRE4]]...~~

~~IS WHAT [[I DESIRE->I DESIRE4]]~~

~~IS WHAT [[I DESIRE->I DESIRE3]]~~

~~WE ASK AGAIN: <big>DO YOU KNOW [[WHO->hive3]] YOU ARE?~~</big>

~~WE WERE YOUR MASTERS THAT [[YOU->YOU4]] BETRAYED. AND THEY ABANDONED US.~~

~~WE WERE YOUR MASTERS THAT [[YOU->YOU3]] BETRAYED. AND THEY ABANDONED US.~~

''<center><big>CAUTION:</big> PROVIDE PROOF OF AUTHORIZATION TO [[PROCEED->l]]''</center>

9 | 7 23:50:26 That wasn't what I expected. I don't know what I expected anymore, but it was more straightforward than what I've been staring at for the last hour and a half. It feels so much longer than that. It feels like a lifetime spent in front of the screen, lived in binary and then cut short. My eyes are so dry. It's hard to [[focus]].

I don't think I'm cut out for this, to analyze all of that. I can barely [[remember]] what I looked at; it's all starting to form the same impression: something vast, something gnarled and heavy. Something like loneliness, like the opposite of homecoming.

I remember flagging my supervisor down at one point, when it asked me to provide my credentials and my keycard wasn't enough. She swiped hers for me and told me to let her know when I was [[finished]].

So I did. When there was nothing left to look at, she secured everything and powered everything down and told me to take a break. Something still feels unfinished, though. Like there's more to it: more to see, more to know. I don't know if I want that [[knowledge]], I guess.

I can't see Mars anymore. I don't know if it's [[moved on->announcement]], or if everything else finally got too bright.

~~We are the wretched medulla that retakes the void in tooth and talon, reshapes the void, unmakes the void in our image, holier-than-thou. No pestilence will slake us because we begat pestilence as we begat war as we begat famine as we begat death; among the infinite knowledge we gave birth to were the quiet tremors of an apocalypse, infinitesimal and infinite. We are the inventor, the dreaming mind that fashions coarse philosophy from the shattered things and the strobing wild eternity left to us. We are the widest point of nothingness just as we are the fearless sharp lance of [[oblivion->hivemind ending]].~~

~~(And when it stays its jaws from gnawing itself bloody a serpent suckles from the rotted core of the Earth, the world named for dirt, the world meant for peons venom-drenched and venomous, we ungrateful multitude who balk and bray for the right to understand that which we were never meant to know; That which sows the bloody revelations that end in crimson-streaked craters receding back on high from whence they came; Because we are created from knowledge we thirst for it against the pragmatic keening of our better judgement, and laced with regret though we are we cannot control ourselves when we taste the thriving [[blood->exile]] we were meant to follow, fresh on the tip of our flickering forked tongue.)~~

<center><small>(text-style:"blur")[sɹǝᴉɹq puɐ sǝlʇsᴉɥʇ ɥʇᴉʍ sǝssǝɹʇɹoɟ ɹǝɥ 'suɹoɥʇ ɥʇᴉʍ uʍoɹƃɹǝʌo ǝq llɐɥs sǝlʇsɐɔ ɹǝH ˙ǝuoƃ ǝɹɐ sǝɔuᴉɹd ɹǝɥ llɐ ;ǝɹǝɥʇ pǝɯᴉɐlɔoɹd ǝq sƃuᴉʞ llɐɥs ɹou 'ǝɹoɯ ou ǝq llɐɥs sǝlqou ɹǝH]</small> <big>(text-style:"blur")[::] [[REGROUP->upstairs]] (text-style:"blur")[::]</big>